Dilemma

How discouraging it was for me to learn today that not only is my mother-in-law displeased with our conversion to Catholicism, she honestly believes we'll be going to hell if we persist in it.

I always knew she was anti-Catholic. My husband remembers not being allowed to play with the little boy down the street because the boy was Catholic. And I've heard her say many little things over the years that hint toward her distrust. But for some reason, I thought that when we converted -- her deeply religious oldest child and I -- I thought she'd open her mind a bit. I thought she knew her son better that this. I thought she knew that her son, my husband, would never make such a choice unless he was absolutely convinced in intellect, emotion and spirit that Catholicism was exactly where Christ wanted him to be.

Foolish of me, I guess.

I don't know what to do about it. I heard all this through the family grapevine, because my mother-in-law wouldn't dream of telling us her feelings to our faces. In fact, it's been over a year, and I was starting to think she was okay with the whole thing beause she hasn't even dropped a hint of misgivings.

I really don't want her to be so uncomfortable with our Catholicism. I don't want her to fear for our souls, or for her grandchildren's in particular. I don't want her to persist in the many misconceptions she has about Catholicism. And I don't want her scheming ways to "correct" my children's belief system now that we are "ruining" it with all this Catholic worship, schooling, etc.

If she would just ask my husband about things and listen to his explanations, she'd be thoroughly satisfied. I know she would be. But she won't ask.

When he got home from work tonight, I told my husband what I had learned. He was less surprised than I was. He'd been expecting it, I suppose. I encouraged him to talk to his mother, or a least write a letter, but he doesn't see the point. He's quite certain she'll never change her mind. And he pointed out that if she really wanted to discuss it with him, she'd bring it up herself. Since she has it, it's entirely likely that she'd reject any of his attempts to open the lines of communication.

I learned long ago not to meddle in family relationships, so there isn't anything more I can say or do to get the two of them talking. And I can't approach her myself without my husband's okay. So once again, I am "stuck" with prayer as my only recourse.

Well, that and blogging about it so that maybe some of you can pray that we can set my mother-in-law at ease about the whole thing.

--Sparki